Netflix Is NOT Dead, Biotches!

For the last few days, I've been reading reports on various websites about Netflix, and how the company is starting to show signs of weakness. On Yahoo especially, there have been more than a few reports talking about how Netflix did not beat the Wall Street expectations in the third quarter 2012, and how signs are showing that the streaming service is starting to fail.

Well, quite frankly, that's just a bunch of crap.

I've heard the same sentiments before. A few years ago, Blockbuster was supposed to be the ones that was coming to knock out Netflix once and for all. After all, Blockbuster had plenty of walk-in stores. Now, they were going to add a rent by mail service that was supposed to rival Netflix. The idea was that the one-two punch was going to deliver a knockout blow.

Well, that didn't happen. Instead, five years later, it's Blockbuster that has gone bye-bye. And Netflix? Well, their stock rose almost eightfold since those days.

But now, those same type of rumors, signaling the demise of Netflix are in the air again. Never mind the fact that they are still the number one online streaming service, the number one rent by mail service, and the most recognizable brand in both of those arenas. If you listen to the naysayers, it's time to start preparing the coffin for Netflix.

Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say.

Let me go on a rant for a few minutes, and tell you exactly why Netflix isn't going anywhere.

1. Netflix is still growing.

Users in the coming quarter. Netflix themselves came out and said that their subscriber base will only grow to about 200,000 more users in the next quarter. That's still more than the projected growth in revenues for other streaming services. Netflix actually added almost 2,000,000 more members since the beginning of the year. And as they state, quarter 2  has always been a slow period for Netflix growth.

The truth of the matter is, Netflix has experienced a 21% first-quarter revenue growth since last year.

2. The other streaming services suck.

Wal-Mart's going to try it again. This will be the third time Wal-Mart has tried to enter the arena of movie streaming. Did you know about it the first two times they tried? Probably not. And even though there may be one or two good movies available on demand through Wal-Mart's VUDU streaming service, it can't match Netflix. And why would you want to stream the newest movie for $3.99, when you can go down to your local Redbox and read it for only one dollar? It doesn't make sense, and in the end, Wal-Mart is going to fail again.

And what about Amazon.com's streaming service? Well quite frankly, they're not much different. A lot of newer movies, but you are still lacking in the classics category, without paying just as much for a 30-year old movie, if you cared about such a thing.

The daunting question still remains: why would you pay $3.99 for a digital rental, when you can go down to Redbox, or your local video store and rent it for significantly less? It doesn't make sense.

3. Netflix users are more loyal than you think.

Don't let the reports of former subscriber outrage fool you. The truth is, more people stayed with Netflix than left. Sure, people were mad when they found out they had to pay extra for streaming, but the majority of users just chose etween one or the other. I had both, now I just use  streaming. And those of us who are relatively cheap like it that way.

$7.99 a month for unlimited Netflix streaming is still a better deal than one channel on cable. I have both Netflix and DirecTV, and when I do want to see something new, I walk down to my local video store and get it. I have a Redbox account, but I use it maybe once or twice every other month.

Simply put, I like the diversity of Netflix. I like having to think about what it is I want to watch, and on the backend, they seemed to honor my request and add more content to my liking.

And when I recently took into consideration the prices for the DVD service, it made me think, and now, I'm thinking about restarting my DVD mailing service on Netflix. Two DVDs at a time is only $20. That means that you can pretty much watch six new movies a week for $20 a month, if you return the movie after viewing it immediately.

Six movies a week times, four weeks a month, equals 24 mailer movie rentals, plus all the streaming movies that you want.

Seriously people, you're going to complain about that?

4. Netflix is branching out.

One thing that the larger studios in Hollywood realized over the last 15 to 20 years was that they were going to have to diversify and order to survive. It's one of the reasons why you see Disneyland California Adventure, Universal Studios Orlando Florida, and the like. It's why you see Star Trek licensed practically everywhere, including Las Vegas. The bigger you are, the more legs you have to prop yourself on.

Netflix is no different. As of this year, Netflix has begun licensing and creating its own programming. "Lilyhammer" is its first offering, a comedy/drama about a mobster that's relocated to.of all places, Norway. It stars Steven Van Zandt of Bruce Springsteen fame, and it's pretty good.

They are also in the midst of producing new episodes of the Fox cult classic "Arrested Development" as well as some other original programming. Also in the resurrection rumor mill: CBS's "Jericho", and Comedy Central's "Reno 911".

It has been estimated that Netflix will spend anywhere from $75 million-$100 million over the next few years creating new content for its subscribers... and its subscribers only.

In other words, instead of crying about the movie studios taking their ball and going home, Netflix is creating their own ball. "Lilyhammer" has already been certified as a hit, and will be back as soon as more episodes can be made, probably sometime next year.

Original content puts Netflix way ahead of the other streaming services in this regard.

Enough with my defense of Netflix. People are just going to hate. That's just the way it is. But to say that Netflix is beating its last breath like some of these articles have irresponsibly is just ridiculous. Netflix is a great deal for the money. And if you haven't plunked down $20 a month for the streaming service with the mailer service, or even tried just the streaming, then you should just keep your mouth shut, and grumble to yourself.

If you want to check out Netflix, go here.

Janet Jackson Whores Out For Nutrisystem

Now, when I think about Janet Jackson, I think about the 80s, the "Rhythm Nation" album, those years on "Good Times" when she played that cute little kid. After "Rhythm Nation 1814", it all went south for me. Janet Jackson suddenly tried to become sexy. Which I know works for a lot of people. Don't judge me, it just didn't work for me. Except in examples like above. Then it worked for me A LOT.

Well, Janet Jackson got old. And when people get older, they tend to put on a few pounds. And, when you're in music, and put out an album every 3 to 5 years, you really put on the pounds, especially when you hide in a cave somewhere, eating bonbons in between said albums. I think we all remember when Janet came out on hiding long enough to mourn her brother Michael's death a few years back. To say that she put on a few pounds since we saw her in public last would have been an understatement at best. In other words, little Janet was a little chubby.

So, like many other celebrities, Janet Jackson fell to peer pressure as well as a few dollar bills being waved in her face, and decided to whore herself out to Nutrisystem. And, of course, the results were absolutely amazing. Or so you are led to believe.

We all know that Janet Jackson has been known to wear a corset from time to time, but either she is wearing the tightest corset ever made, or she's been photoshopped to the extreme in the photo that the company officially released the other day. It doesn't seem to compare to her commercial, which we've also posted below. I don't know, you be the judge. Based on the photo posted below, should Janet Jackson release another album, or should she join the circus with the Invisible Man and the Bearded Lady? You decide!

Janet obviously opted to break a rib or two to get into Vampira's old dress.

In any case, Janet has always known how to get herself into fighting shape when tour time comes around. The question is, will she keep the weight off? After all, this isn't just about a paycheck, it's about a lifestyle change...right? Time and the paparazzi cameras will tell...

Kelsey Grammer Is Not Thinking This Through, Part 5

Oh Kelsey Grammer, aren't you just a romantic!

I mean, if anybody should know about romance, it's Kelsey Grammer. After all, he met his first wife, got married for eight years and was separated six of those years, his second wife was a stripper, and that marriage lasted exactly one year, his third wife was a girl he met at a bar, and broke up with a year later, in his fourth wife was a former Playboy model. If any man is a model of rock solid relationships, it's Kelsey Grammer.

But make no mistake, he's learned his lesson. Wife number five will be the one. It would be a woman that he will spend the rest of his life with! How do I know? He's getting inked, brother!! Radar Online reports:

Kelsey Grammer got his first tattoo this weekend and inked his fourth wife’s name, Kayte Walsh, onto his hip.
The 57-year-old actor got the design at Insight Studios in Chicago on Saturday.
PHOTOS: Camille Films Real Housewives
He came in with Kayte, who he tied the knot with last year following his split with The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Camille Grammer.
“Kelsey was so enamored with his wife -- it was all about her," an eyewitness tells RadarOnline.com.
"It was obvious that he really cares a lot about her.  He loves her so much he wanted to do something special.

There is nothing that screams the word "desperate douche" more than being a 57 year old guy that's been married four times and is trying to hang on to what semblance of youth or recognition he has. And nothing screams desperation more than a 57-year-old man getting a tattoo. But then again, I guess if you write a wife's name of your body somewhere today, you'll remember who to make out the alimony checks to five years from now.

Kanye West And Kim Kardashian Are An Item

Now I know what you're saying. You're saying that the idea of Kim Kardashian hooking up with Kanye West is far beyond anything you can think of. I mean, the thought of Kim Kardashian hooking up with a famous rich black guy, and Kanye hooking up with a girl with a big ass is TOTALLY not like them, right? And hey, I ain't saying she's a gold digger...but she ain't messin' wit no...aw, you get it. TMZ and the rest of the free world reports:

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are dating ... for real ... TMZ has learned.

Sources tell us the relationship is "just starting." The two were photographed on their way out of a movie date to see "Hunger Games"  in NYC last night (above).

Apparently, Kanye has been after Kim for a while -- he just released a new song, "Theraflu" ... in which he says he had feelings for the reality star while she was dating Kris Humphries.

"And I admit I fell in love with Kim ... 'Round the same time she fell in love with him ... That's cool, babygirl, do your thing ... Lucky I ain't had Jay drop him from the team."

Kanye is referring to Jay Z -- who owns the NJ Nets ... the team Humphries plays for.

The report failed to mention that the reason that Kim had to take the walk of shame was because after a long night, the room was too full of cheeks and egos. Let it process, let it process...

Madonna Is Looking For (Some) Molly

Madonna is a self-delusional dope who, like the groundhog she is, has to stick her head out a hole every few years to show the world that she's still relevant. This season, she must have seen spring because she hasn't gone back into her hole since the SuperBowl.

So, to prove that she's still relevant, and not the 53-year old quasi-British wannabe old hag hanger on that she truly is, she dropped a new album this year, entitled MDNA, an obvious play on MDMA, the technical name for the drug Ecstasy. She went further by making the album a club / techno / house oriented record, using producers such as William Orbit, Martin Solveig and Benny Benassi, all house and techno type dudes.

Well, when she dropped a comment about MDMA at a recent concert, she was called on it by DJ DeadMau5. Then, the fun began in earnest. Isn't it always fun when stuff gets dropped at raves? (See what I did there?? HA!!)  TMZ reports:

Madonna says DeadMau5 is DeadWrong ... claiming she was NOT promoting drug use at a concert in Florida ... despite allegations she used her stage time to glamorize the drug ecstasy.

Deadmau5 -- one of the most famous DJs in the world -- had attacked Madonna as a "f**king idiot" for asking the crowd at the Ultra Music Festival if anyone has "seen Molly" -- Molly is a slang term for the active ingredient in ecstasy.

Now, Madge is lashing back ... with a pair of mouse ears.

The Material Girl posted a photo of herself in Mickey Mouse gear ... with the caption, "From one mouse to another I dont support drug use and i never have. I was referring to the song called "Have You Seen Molly" written by my friend Cedric Gervais who I almost worked with on my album."

Deadmau5 saw the tweet and replied ... saying, "Fair enough, I was just voicing my concerns as I usually do. +1 respect for clearing it up personally ... regardless, just be a little more aware of what you should represent at EDM events, and I'll watch my mouth."

Madge replied ... "Communication is always best. You should have called me first, we could have cleared it up 'privately.' ;) See you on the road."

What the hell ever. The only thing this stupid song says is "Help me find Molly," "Molly makes me want to dance," and just about every other "Mary Jane" influenced innuendo you can throw into a crappy 8-minute techno song. DeadMau5 (correctly) calls out Madonna for a flippant use of a terminology of a drug that has resulted in numerous deaths and hospitalizations over the the last few years at underground parties and raves, and DeadMau5 folded like a worn out futon when the Queen weakly counters his call out. Not that I had any respect for techno music anyway, but both of these artist should go looking for Molly and never come back. Oh, that wasn't me saying they should both OD on Ecstasy. Honestly, I didn't mean that at all. I was talking about Molly Ringwald. Yeah, that's it. Loved her in "16 Candles."

Here's the song "Help Me Find Molly":

Another New Avengers Trailer

Yes, I know this week is all about "The Hunger Games", but I always like to rage against the light. So, here's another trailer for "The Avengers". Make sure you use the bathroom BEFORE you watch it, or you may wet your pants uncontrollably, like I did. Hey, I admitted it. Don't judge me, dude. I now officially knows how my German Shepherd feels now when she gets excited and can't control herself, and goes all Snoopy Happy Feet on me. so I'll never get mad at her again.

Take THIS, Katniss!!!

Ray J Didn't Know Whitney Was Coking Up

So, everyone knows that Whitney Houston and Ray J (AKA Brandy's Little Brother) had been "very close friends" for a long time. They were deemed an "alleged couple in 2007, 2009, and again just weeks before her death. But even though everyone in Hollywood knew about Whitney's drug problems, including family, friends, music executives, Oprah, spacemen, highlanders, deepsea divers, and, oh, everyone else on the planet that breathes air, the one person that didn't was Ray J. Can you believe it? TMZ reports:

Ray J is pissed that people are accusing him of being Whitney's enabler and, even worse, fueling her with the fatal dose of cocaine.

Ray J's rep tells TMZ ... the singer had NO KNOWLEDGE that Whitney was using again.

The rep says Ray J is especially upset at claims made by Bobby Brown's sister, Leolah Brown, who went on TV Thursday night and suggested Ray J was to blame for Whitney's demise.  Ray J says the claim is absolute B.S.

Now, there's probably no way we'll ever know for sure about Ray J and Whitney, because, as we all know, Ray J. likes to keep things on the downlow. Like that time he dated Kim Kardashian. Good thing he kept that under wraps. It might have totally ruined her reputation.

Crap, Michael Bay Is About To Mess Up Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

I don't mind telling you that I think that the Michael Bay Transformers movies to me have the entertainment value of those hurricane and storm alert warning reports on CNN or your typical SuperBowl pre-game show: they're both loud, long, boring and have no value to me whatsoever. Now the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie franchise has been hit and miss over it's history. First, there was a live-action movie that was cool (for 1990 standards), that cost $13 million to make, and raked in over $200 million. So, of course, instead of getting a good script and director, the movie was followed by two unimaginative sequels that pretty much killed the cash cow by 1993. Then a computer animated movie that dropped in 2007 that made about $95 million that was pretty good. So, those of us who liked it have been waiting for a sequel. But, don't you know that Hollywood is all about self-destruction and screwing up the simplist things by tossing money at it when it doesn't need to. So why should the TMNT franchise be any different? Friggin' AAAARGH. Yahoo Movies reports:

Michael Bay seems to be at it again: This time the creator of mega-blockbusters is planning to produce a new, live-action version of "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles." But, if he has his way, he may need to change the name to "Not So Mutant" Alien Turtles. Definitely less catchy.

The "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" director told a crowd recently at the Nickelodeon Upfront New York event that instead of the series fans have loved about a mutant strain of turtles from earth who are obsessed with pizza and turn into two-footed creatures thanks to some transmutant goo, Bay's reptiles will simply be an alien race.

As first called out on the blog StuffWeLike, Bay explained his vision for the 2013 remake: "When you see this movie, kids are going to believe, one day, that these turtles actually do exist when we are done with this movie." Wha? And then, "The turtles are from an alien race, and they are going to be tough, edgy, funny, and completely loveable."

Once again, Michael Bay is killing the childhood memories of millions of people so he can CGI the crap out of a bunch of dudes wearing rubber suits. This is going to suck harder than that tube that Augustus Gloop got stuck in. The only way Michael Bay could do less damage to TMNT is if he actually stabbed the four turtles in front of a bunch of kids, threw the severed remains in a pot and slowly ate the juicy turtle remains in front of them.

Kristen Bell REALLY Loves Sloths. Really. (VIDEO)

 

OK, now this is really strange. Now, like any red-blooded male, I think Kristen Bell is an absolute hottie. Girl can absolutely no wrong, and I'd even give her a pass if she pulled a Sarah Marshall on me because, well, she's Kristen Bell, darn it, and if she came at me with that bikini, I'd forgive her, too.

Well, like any other red-blooded male, you'd want to know the one thing you could do to make your girlfriend cry. The one thing that would turn her into putty in your hands. The one thing that would make her love you forever. If you're a guy who's ever chased a girl, you know exactly what I'm talking about.

Well, thanks to the magic of television, we now know what it is that pushes Kristen Bell's buttons.

Is it candy? No, that's way too easy. Is it a leading role in a major television series? Nah, been there done that. Is it a foot massage? You know, the kind where you got your stuff down, and you ain't be tickling or nothing (thanks, Quentin)? No, it's not even the ultimate in foot massages. What, then, could it possibly be?

Well, for Kristen Bell, it's a sloth.

Yeah, that's what I said. A sloth. One of those weird creatures that do nothing but hang in trees in the jungle, eat, and move at a two miles an hour.

Don't ask me why. KB be crazy... Crazy for that Bradypodidae style. You know what I'm saying, G? Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Talkin' about that Pygmy three-toed sloth action.

Now you know, nerd. But sorry to say, Ellen beat you to the punch. Dang Ellen. Wench has all kind of game. Ellen pulled out the Sloth card, and KB caved like LeBron in a NBA playoff.

First Portia DeRossi, now Kristen Bell. Can't a brother get a win once in a while? Damn. I hate the player AND the game today.

Check out the video:

Chris Rock Attacks Cameraman About Tea Party Comments

"I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity."
  -Old Chris Rock Quote

There's a right way to deal with stuff, and a wrong way to deal. And then I guess, there's there's the Chris Rock way. When asked by author/reporter Jason Mattera about a comment he made about Tea Party people being racist in Esquire magazine last year, he went off, and attacked the author's cameraman. Now, some of you may think that Chris Rock had a right, and a camera shouldn't have been anywhere near him. And you may have been right...if he hadn't been a big star at a major film festival where (guess what??) they have CAMERAS. So that doesn't play with me here.

And considering this happened two months ago, Rock has had plenty of time to prepare for the crapfest that's about to ensue. Seriously. So don't cry for him, Argentina.

It's not the first time Chris Rock has flipped out on his political stances. Back in 2007, he went off with a obscenity-laced introduction of the Red Hot Chili Peppers that had to be censored by the BBC during a Live Earth concert. The promoters apologized for the rant, but Rock didn't recant, saying later, “I like to say those things. It’s not good weed if you don’t choke”.

The comic also delivered a further verbal two-finger to the event by quipping, “I think this will do for global warming what Live 8 did for ending world hunger.”

 

Why KONY 2012 Is Complete Crap

Unlike most people, I have this tendency to watch where I step, because quite frankly, there's usually a big pile of crap where you least expect it to be. So when Invisible Children's Kony 2012 video suddenly went viral last week, I treated it like every other video that goes viral-- with a great big proclamation of "I CALL BULLSHIT", smelling the complete over-hype. I'm not the only one. PrisonPlanet.com reports:

According to Jason Russell’s appearance on the Today show several days ago, over 500,000 action kits have been ordered at $30 a piece, meaning this campaign has brought in a minimum of $15M in revenue this week. This is great news: at least 500,000 people are “advocate[s] of awesome” according to the group’s webstore! So where’s that money going? I’ll leave it to Jedidiah Jenkins, Invisible Children’s Director of Ideology:

“Thirty-seven percent of our budget goes directly to central African-related programs, about 20 percent goes to salaries and overhead, and the remaining 43 percent goes to our awareness programs. […] But aside from that, the truth about Invisible Children is that we are not an aid organization, and we don’t intend to be. I think people think we’re over there delivering shoes or food. But we are an advocacy and awareness organization.”
Yes, you heard it from Invisible Children: more money goes to awareness than to Africa.

Oh, so only about 30% of the money from those mini Shepard Fairey kits are actually going to help anyone. If that. In other words, Invisible Children will probably pocket about $9 million of the $15 million they raised. OK. But, oh, there's more...

More detailed breakdown from the Guardian’s Julian Borger, John Vidal, and Rosebell Kagumire in Kampala, Uganda...

“Invisible Children’s accounts show it is a cash rich operation, which more than tripled its income to $9m (£5.68m) in 2011, mainly from personal donations. Of this, nearly 25% was spent on travel and film-making. Most of the money raised has been spent in the US. The accounts show $1.7m went on US employee salaries, $850,000 in film production costs, $244,000 in “professional services” – thought to be Washington lobbyists – and $1.07m in travel expenses. Nearly $400,000 was spent on offices in San Diego.”

OK, granted they spend a lot of money, but at least we know where the money's going...right? Well, about that...

[Invisible Children]  have also been criticized by the Better Business Bureau for refusing to provide information necessary to determine if IC meets the Bureau’s standards.


Additionally, IC has a low two-star rating in accountability from Charity Navigator because they won’t let their financials be independently audited. That’s not a good thing. In fact, it’s a very bad thing, and should make you immediately pause and reflect on where the money you’re sending them is going.

So before you put on your red shirt (which is a great color to hide in when you're putting up those posters at night, by the way), take a minute, and resist the urge to be swayed by images of poor little kids and horrible stories of brutality. I'm not saying that Kony is The Pope, but what I AM saying is there's a lot more to the story than meets the eye here. And if Rihanna's for it, that should give you enough of a reason to question it based on that alone.

A few more people who are pissed off about KONY 2012: