Janet Jackson Whores Out For Nutrisystem

Now, when I think about Janet Jackson, I think about the 80s, the "Rhythm Nation" album, those years on "Good Times" when she played that cute little kid. After "Rhythm Nation 1814", it all went south for me. Janet Jackson suddenly tried to become sexy. Which I know works for a lot of people. Don't judge me, it just didn't work for me. Except in examples like above. Then it worked for me A LOT.

Well, Janet Jackson got old. And when people get older, they tend to put on a few pounds. And, when you're in music, and put out an album every 3 to 5 years, you really put on the pounds, especially when you hide in a cave somewhere, eating bonbons in between said albums. I think we all remember when Janet came out on hiding long enough to mourn her brother Michael's death a few years back. To say that she put on a few pounds since we saw her in public last would have been an understatement at best. In other words, little Janet was a little chubby.

So, like many other celebrities, Janet Jackson fell to peer pressure as well as a few dollar bills being waved in her face, and decided to whore herself out to Nutrisystem. And, of course, the results were absolutely amazing. Or so you are led to believe.

We all know that Janet Jackson has been known to wear a corset from time to time, but either she is wearing the tightest corset ever made, or she's been photoshopped to the extreme in the photo that the company officially released the other day. It doesn't seem to compare to her commercial, which we've also posted below. I don't know, you be the judge. Based on the photo posted below, should Janet Jackson release another album, or should she join the circus with the Invisible Man and the Bearded Lady? You decide!

Janet obviously opted to break a rib or two to get into Vampira's old dress.

In any case, Janet has always known how to get herself into fighting shape when tour time comes around. The question is, will she keep the weight off? After all, this isn't just about a paycheck, it's about a lifestyle change...right? Time and the paparazzi cameras will tell...

Kelsey Grammer Is Not Thinking This Through, Part 5

Oh Kelsey Grammer, aren't you just a romantic!

I mean, if anybody should know about romance, it's Kelsey Grammer. After all, he met his first wife, got married for eight years and was separated six of those years, his second wife was a stripper, and that marriage lasted exactly one year, his third wife was a girl he met at a bar, and broke up with a year later, in his fourth wife was a former Playboy model. If any man is a model of rock solid relationships, it's Kelsey Grammer.

But make no mistake, he's learned his lesson. Wife number five will be the one. It would be a woman that he will spend the rest of his life with! How do I know? He's getting inked, brother!! Radar Online reports:

Kelsey Grammer got his first tattoo this weekend and inked his fourth wife’s name, Kayte Walsh, onto his hip.
The 57-year-old actor got the design at Insight Studios in Chicago on Saturday.
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He came in with Kayte, who he tied the knot with last year following his split with The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Camille Grammer.
“Kelsey was so enamored with his wife -- it was all about her," an eyewitness tells RadarOnline.com.
"It was obvious that he really cares a lot about her.  He loves her so much he wanted to do something special.

There is nothing that screams the word "desperate douche" more than being a 57 year old guy that's been married four times and is trying to hang on to what semblance of youth or recognition he has. And nothing screams desperation more than a 57-year-old man getting a tattoo. But then again, I guess if you write a wife's name of your body somewhere today, you'll remember who to make out the alimony checks to five years from now.

Kanye West And Kim Kardashian Are An Item

Now I know what you're saying. You're saying that the idea of Kim Kardashian hooking up with Kanye West is far beyond anything you can think of. I mean, the thought of Kim Kardashian hooking up with a famous rich black guy, and Kanye hooking up with a girl with a big ass is TOTALLY not like them, right? And hey, I ain't saying she's a gold digger...but she ain't messin' wit no...aw, you get it. TMZ and the rest of the free world reports:

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are dating ... for real ... TMZ has learned.

Sources tell us the relationship is "just starting." The two were photographed on their way out of a movie date to see "Hunger Games"  in NYC last night (above).

Apparently, Kanye has been after Kim for a while -- he just released a new song, "Theraflu" ... in which he says he had feelings for the reality star while she was dating Kris Humphries.

"And I admit I fell in love with Kim ... 'Round the same time she fell in love with him ... That's cool, babygirl, do your thing ... Lucky I ain't had Jay drop him from the team."

Kanye is referring to Jay Z -- who owns the NJ Nets ... the team Humphries plays for.

The report failed to mention that the reason that Kim had to take the walk of shame was because after a long night, the room was too full of cheeks and egos. Let it process, let it process...