Tila Tequila Tried To Off Herself Again (2012 Version)

I was sitting at home just yesterday, and thinking to myself, " gosh, I haven't heard anything from Tila Tequila for a awhile. I wonder what's happened to her? Maybe she's finally gotten her act together. Yeah, I'm sure that's it. She's probably realized that fame and attention whoring isn't all it's cracked up to be. Maybe she's had a breakthrough, and has decided that this life isn't for her anymore. Yeah that's it. Maybe she's decided to ditch the fame and glamor of Hollywood and settle down with a nice boy, renounce her partying ways, and WHAT OH NOOOO! TMZ reports:

Tila Tequila was rushed to the hospital last week ... after her roommate called 911 and said the reality star was hellbent on doing herself in ... TMZ has learned.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ ... emergency responders came to the home at 1:30 AM on Wednesday ... and Tila was taken by ambulance to St. Joseph's hospital in Burbank, CA.

We're told the roommate told cops Tila had "tried to kill herself all week."

Sources say Tila was in and out of consciousness in the house ... and officials decided she needed psychiatric help, stat. 

You know, they say you have to let go of your past to move ahead. I'm saying this because this is the third or fourth "alleged" suicide attempt for Tila Tequila. I'm not saying that I want her to kill herself, but what I am saying is that everyone seems to get better with practice but her.

Halle Berry Is Engaged (2012 Version)

Halle Berry is engaged again, so let's pick up the wackiness where we we left off...right about...here! Sigh.

We shouldn't be surprised at any of it however. It's just human nature that Halle Berry should find another man pawn sucker idiot.

There are always people ready in a heartbeat to marry the Hot Girl, and as a guy I can understand that, because, hell, I'm a guy, and most guys are led by their man parts AKA Don Draper. But there's another level to this, where the Hot Girl is batshit crazy. You know those types. They're the girls where your reaction is, "yeah, but I'd still hit that in a heart beat! (see "Most Males Responses To Jennifer Love Hewitt").

Then there's the Hot Girl that you KNOW is 100% batshit crazy, and can't seem to hold a man for more than a year. She goes through guys like a rhino's backend pees water. Then she breaks 40, and suddenly, her standards drop like a rock, and she dates guys that make people scratch their collective heads and say "why the hell is she dating him? And what kind of crazy loser is he for dating her?" (see "Jennifer Aniston And Justin Theroux")

This is the Hot Girl that most men know to stay way from, but there's always that ONE guy who gonna chase it anyway. Pray for the one guy, because his life is about to become more complicated than the key signature of a  Frank Zappa song. Radar Online reports:

It's official! After weeks of speculation, Olivier Martinez has confirmed his engagement to Halle Berry.

The Miami Herald reported the happy news after the French actor was asked about the rumors at the opening of his new South Beach restaurant Villa Azur on Saturday night.

"Yes, of course it's true," he said when asked about the news that Star magazine broke through RadarOnline.com in January.

Martinez, 46, was also quick to make sure the man who made the engagement ring for his 45-year-old bride got credit for his work.

"There is a jeweler taking credit for doing the ring and it's a lie," he said. 'They have nothing to do with this."

The ring was in fact designed by a jeweler called Robert Mazlo from his Saint-Germain-de-Pres neighborhood in Paris.

Martinez describes him as "a real artist' who has designed for "kings and queens for many centuries".

Berry has a three-year-old daughter, Nahla, with ex-boyfriend Gabriel Aubry and has been married twice before.

Martinez was in a relationship with Australian pop princess Kylie Minogue for many years before they split in 2007.

Now, Halle Berry is one of the most beautiful women in the world, and even at 45, she can still rock the bikini body, no doubt. But Girl Can't Hold A Man To Save Her Life.

She married David Justice, who got abusive with her, so, or course, she had to get out of that, and no one's blaming her for that, so she did.

Then she married Eric Benet....who cheated on her. Strange that anyone would cheat on hot-ass Halle Berry, but, OK.

Then, she shacked up with Gabriel Aubry who was ten years younger than her, and knocked her up before they broke up.

And now, in the middle of ongoing custody battles, we find out she's getting married. We're not saying that it isn't love, but Halle's hitting those hot flash years, so this guy had better have a rock solid pre-nup. And maybe a bullet-proof vest. And properly working smoke detectors.

Whitney Houston Was Broke

Since Whitney Houston's death, her handlers and her family's handlers have been swaering up and down that she hadn't snorted up her vast fortune, and that she had lots of money. Then came her divorce from Bobby Brown, who hadn't had a hit (or a clue) in 10 years. So when you divorce, you have to file papers that include financial info. So in 2007, that's what Whitney did. You'll never guess what the bank said! RadarOnline reports:

Whitney Houston filed an income and expense declaration during her divorce proceedings with former husband, Bobby Brown, and the documents reveal that she had a life insurance policy worth only $300k, had under $29k in her checking account and had debts of more than $4 million dollars, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting...

The Grammy award winning singer filed the docs in 2007 and stated she had $40k in cash, $225k in stocks and earned in excess of $1 million for performances. Whitney's real estate assets included one property in New Jersey which was worth $6.5 million but she owed $3.247 million on that estate.  She also owned a townhouse in Atlanta, Georgia, which is where Bobbi Kristina is now living, which was worth $1.244, but she owed $1,046,603 on the property...Whitney's bottom line was that she had $10,242,931 in various assets, and had debts totaling $4,294,014.

Now, you have to take this all in context. Whitney Houston signed a $100 million dollar contract in 2001. And that was after the height of her career. Either she blew all her money on drugs like they say or she...or she...hell, I've got nothing. hey, what do you want? It's not like she just left $90 million in her other coat pocket.

Bobbi Kristina Just Got Richer

I'm not saying that I'm speaking about Whitney Houston and Bobbi Kristina Brown specifically in the example that follows, but I honestly think that there is no greater cosmic joke that making hundreds of millions of dollars, then blowing the majority of it in a decades long drug binge, and then leaving the $1.98 you have left to your only daughter upon your death, upon which the popularity of your death makes HER hundreds of millions of dollars so she can blow it in a decades long drug binge. Crack IS whack. TMZ reports:

Whitney Houston's 19-year-old daughter Bobbi Kristina got inconceivably richer the day her mother died -- because the singer left Bobbi 100% of her assets in her will ... an estate valued at around $20 million.

According to reports, Whitney's will doesn't enumerate specific assets -- but she leaves ALL furnishings, clothing, personal effects, jewelry and cars to her surviving children ... i.e. Bobbi.
According to reports, Houston's money will be put in a trust -- which Bobbi will have access to in stages ... earning a portion when she turns 21, another chunk when she turns 25, and the rest when she turns 30.

The will was just filed today in Atlanta. Whitney signed it back in 1993, a month before she gave birth to Bobbi.

Sad to say, that without someone responsible looking over her shoulder, it's a very good chance that with the combination of rebellious youth, instant fame, and bad parenting examples, Bobbi Kristina will blow through this cash faster than her Mom did (pun intended). And why shouldn't she with such stellar role models and life examples to follow after? After all, it's her prerogative.

Hulk Hogan May Have A Sex Tape

"Well, you know Mean Gene, people have seen the Hulkster, brother! You've seen him slam Andre The Giant, the immovable force. You've seen stand toe to toe with the Ultimate Warrior, brother! But you haven't seen anything until you've seen the REAL 24-inch python, brother!"

OK, sorry. Got caught up there for a second. I thought it was 1980. Anyhoo, reports have surfaced that Hulk Hogan has a sex tape out there somewhere, and that it's been leaked and it's being shopped around, which means, as per always, Vivid video has a chance to get it's name in the news, as it does every time you mention the words "sex tape", "celebrity"  and "third party" are mentioned in the same sentence. TMZ reports:

A sex tape featuring legendary wrestler Hulk Hogan has surfaced -- and TMZ has learned, it's currently being shopped to a major porn studio.

We've seen a portion of the grainy footage -- featuring Hulk getting undressed and a naked, unidentified brunette lying on a bed. The woman is NOT his ex-wife Linda or his current wife Jennifer McDaniel.

In the clip, Hulk pulls his shirt off and brags to his companion, "I started to work out again." Hulk then runs his hands through his blonde hair like he always does.

The best part ... Hulk's thong-shaped tan line.

It's unclear when the tape was shot -- but Vivid honcho Steve Hirsch tells TMZ, he was approached with the tape very recently by a third party.

So far, no word on whether Hirsch or anyone else has made an offer to buy the tape.

Hulk did not have an immediate comment. 

So whatcha gonna do when Hulkamania and Vivid video run wild on you!!

Wait..he did say RUN wild on you, didn't he? OK, considering it's a sex tape, I thought he might have said something else.

Christina Hendricks' Phone Got Hacked, Nude Photos Leaked

So, what do you do when you have a hit TV show that been off the air for more than a year, and no one cares about it anymore? You start up your PR department, and drop a bunch of fake news stories and events. Now no one cares about Christina Hendricks, and they haven't  for a while now. Two years ago, she was the woman with the large rack and red hair and curves that made it cool to be "full figured." Then, "Mad Men" got delayed because of contract negotiations for more than a year, which is pretty ridiculous, considering that 1. there are only 12 episodes a year, and 2.  there are only 12 episodes a year. So since then, the show hasn't been on the mind of a lot of people. But with the return of "Mad Men" this month, how, oh how, do we get the show back in the minds of people? Stir up fake promotional poster controversies? Put Jon Hamm on SNL in a cameo role? Yeah, those are good ideas, but we need something else... think, man, think! (SNAP) I've got it? Let's leak nude pics of the redhead with the bazoongas!!! Brilliant! TMZ reports:

Busy day in the world of naked photo leaks ... just hours after Olivia Munn's allegedly naked body hit the web, a set of pics has surfaced online showing what appears to be a topless Christina Hendricks ... but Hendricks' rep insists, the breasts aren't hers.

Christina's rep tells TMZ, the "Mad Men" star's phone WAS indeed hacked recently ... and multiple self-shots were stolen -- including several showing a busty Hendricks barely dressed, without make-up, presumably at home.

But the rep insists, the one topless picture -- purportedly showing the actress' bare ample bosom -- is NOT Christina. It's an impostor.

Christina's rep tells TMZ, she doesn't know who hacked her phone -- but the proper authorities have been notified and an investigation is underway.

Now, here the thing. Christina Hendricks has been partially nude in more than a few things, so this really isn't a big deal. And I'm not saying this story is fake (completely), but this story dropping three weeks before the return of "Mad Men" is enough to make the AMC press department * in their pants like the Lonely Island. I'm betting if this story had been about her missing dog, it wouldn't have gotten nearly as much press. Just sayin'.

Bonus video dedicated to the AMC Press Department:

"Live At Daryl's House" Bring Back Live Music To TV

"Live At Daryl's House" is a show that fills a void that has been empty for years on TV, and it does it in a way that makes you want to tune in every week.

One of the things that I miss is the TV shows that brought live music into your home every week. NBC had a great program about 20 years ago, called "Sunday Night." It came on late at night, around 11:30pm every Sunday night.

For a network program, it was way ahead of its time. The music that featured was an eclectic mix of different styles and genres from every portion of music. On one show you had a performer like David Sanborn, (who actually was the host for a year), and then have Sonic Youth play later on in the same show. Some of the featured groups that graced Sunday Night included Sting, Bill Frizell, The Pixies, Mary Margaret O'Hara, Kronos Quartet, and a ton of other great acts, all playing live and unfiltered. Here's a perfect example of this below from Screaming Jay Hawkins. Definitely not for prime time.

 

I bring up "Sunday Night" because, as I said, there aren't many shows that feature music in that it may anymore. But I wanted to bring up one of my favorite new programs that I've been watching called "Live At Daryl's House." the Daryl is Daryl Hall, of Hall n Oates fame, and his show makes me think about how cool live performing is, especially on TV.

You can tell be watching "Live At Daryl's House" that Hall is a music fan first off, and fan of certain styles of music second. He quizzes Smokey Robinson on "Tears Of A Clown.", on another he gets into a blues jam with KT Tunstall. Like "Sunday Night", "Live At Daryl's House" varied and features some great live jams and performances.

Basically, what Hall has done is bult a studio out of a barn at his home, in which he invites a bunch of studio musicians and a special guest to sit and play music with him. There have been some very good shows thus far, ranging from Smokey Robinson  to Nick Lowe to Todd Rundgren. Hall has been doing the show since 2007 online, but they are just now making their way to television in selected areas. You can check them all out at LiveFromDarylsHouse.com or check your local listing for times the broadcast airs in your area.

Check out a episode below: